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Tiger’s wood leaked

Update: August, 27/2017 - 09:00
Viet Nam News

by Robert Bicknell

Tiger Woods used to make highly accurate and intuitive decisions on the golf course, which helped him win a gazillion tournaments and make himself one of the most feared competitors in golf. Nobody instilled this kind of fear in opponents since Jack Nicklaus.

Unfortunately, ever since his marriage infidelity scandal, things have gone from bad to worse to unbelievable, including his judgment and decisions.

Yes, Tiger is in the news again, but not because he entered or checked out of a rehab clinic, or because he was pulled over for DUI (Driving Under the Influence), and certainly not because of golf…

No, this time he’s in the news because someone hacked his ex-girlfriend, Lindsey Vonn’s phone and discovered some lewd pics. Including, what some sites claim, are Tiger showing his wood…

Yes, Tiger had sent Vonn a nude “selfie” of himself.

As this is a family newspaper, I am trying to self-censor myself, but it’s killing me because there is just so much room for fun with this story.

Obviously, Tiger’s role models were not just his father, Jack Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer but also disgraced US politician Anthony Weiner, a man who also couldn’t stop sending pics of his wiener to ladies. Come to think of it, a few other politicians and FOX News contributors have this same proclivity.

I have trouble understanding how anyone who is as much a control freak as Tiger Woods is, would voluntarily send highly personal and private pics to someone, especially when considering how often celebrities phones get hacked.

Did he not understand that there are people out there who make a career out of hacking celebrities phones, computers and websites?

Was this a deliberate leak in hopes of publicity? Has being out of the limelight for so long caused Tiger to look for ways to get back in the public eye?

It wouldn’t be the first time this tactic was used…

Kim Kardashian was a nobody whose only claim to fame was an enormous butt. She became famous by being one of the first “wanna-be celebrity” sex tapes leaked to the internet. Yes, she leaked it herself. Obviously, that tape would have to be filmed wide angle and can only be shown in IMAX theatres. However, because of that tape, she became well-known and parlayed her big butt into a career and became a brand unto herself. Later, the entire family joined in and now they have clothing lines, fragrances, a few reality shows and who knows what.

She later married Kanye West, which made it the first time a big ass married an even bigger ass.

Paris Hilton really didn’t need publicity to be famous as her family name was already plastered on hotels worldwide. Being the daughter of a billionaire, you’d think the last thing she’d want or need is to be more recognized, but, she too secretly released a sex tape.

The internet is filled with amateur sex chat sites, with a ridiculous amount of people all hoping to be “discovered." People have become so desperate for recognition that they are doing some pretty weird things and, thanks to the internet, they are available for everyone to see.

I don’t think Tiger was looking for publicity, but I do think he exhibited some really poor judgment, and Lindsey Vonn’s was even worse. Why did she keep the pic on her phone? She and Tiger broke up quite a while ago. Why the hell didn’t she encrypt it? There are a lot of apps for this specific purpose nowadays and, being a pretty hot looking female celebrity, she should have known she’d be a target for the hackers.

Obviously, physical skill doesn’t necessarily translate into mental abilities.

So, now she and Tiger are threatening to sue the website who posted the pics online if they don’t remove them. Is Tiger so far gone that he doesn’t understand once on the web it’s there forever?

When I hear about school kids “sexting”, I wonder if they really understand how badly this can hurt them later in life and when someone as media savvy as Tiger Woods screws up this badly, it doesn’t bode well for the rest of us. 

Well, at least it gets people’s talking about something other than his return someday. VNS



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