Friday, September 21 2018


Sleeping on the job!

Update: September, 25/2012 - 10:40


A young would-be thief was caught sound asleep in a house that he had broken into in central Quang Ngai Province last Sunday morning. The unfortunate gent it believed to have slipped into the house when the owner went out to do open-air exercises the night before.

After rummaging through the entire house without finding anything of real value to pinch, he hid as the owner and his wife returned and went upstairs to bed. Our amateur burglar tip-toed silently up the stairs to the third floor where he found them sleeping in a bedroom.

While waiting for the sounds of deep slumber so he could continue his search of the house, our young hopeful lay down on a pillow outside their room. Unfortunately for him, the couple woke before him, found him hugging the pillow – and sound asleep.

Even in the dark world of crime, it appears there are rules – and sleeping on the job is not one of them!

It must be Christmas!

All officials and the staff from southern Vinh Long Province's Industry and Trade Department flocked to a local restaurant recently to join in a farewell party for the department's former director.

There was even more fun and frivolity than usual, because the whole celebration was held during office hours. Wheeee!

But the locals who trotted up to the department to discuss industrial and trading matters waited for ages before a departmental security guard told them that no one was coming back for the day.

The new director said the party had to be held at the local restaurant because the department did not have a canteen. He said staff were grateful to the former director for holding the party in working hours!

Eat your heart out Father Christmas!

Swimming with the fish

Some Vietnamese refer to them as the Yellow Fish (Ca Vang), a slightly derogatory term related to the colour of their uniforms and their often lackadaisical manner in handling traffic problems and constant need for income support.

The motorcycle police in black get all the kudos, because when they move, they really move. Wild things on two-wheels go out of their way to avoid them.

But the Yellow Fish who "control" the endless streams of fish (drivers) now have to take much more time when dealing with cases. They have to refer to a 24-page handbook on how to properly behave toward those accused of breaking the law - especially if the drivers are elderly, women, children – or even the disabled. The handbook also reminds them how to properly behave with all citizens and visitors.

The new handbook insists that they be friendly, polite and attentively listen to all accused of breaking the law. They must also clearly explain the situation to transgressors. No shouting as some did in the old days!

The new move has been piloted for the past few months by Ha Noi's Traffic Police Office, and some citizens claim it is already working. That is, apart from the cop who recently asked a colleague's wife for her phone number and asked her when she was free for an hour. Oops!

Sad, but true

One of the capital city's tributes to 1,000 years of Ha Noi-Thang Long on the Red River was a marvellous, low-level mosaic encapsulating Viet Nam's heritage from the Dong Son era 4,000 years ago to symbols of the modern nation.

It is several kilometres long and truly a memorable vista for visitors. However, on a hot day recently, an unsuspecting journalist drove from end to end holding his nose to avoid an acrid smell. Yes, readers, it appears that the unthinkable has happened.

Before the news reaches too many international tourists, perhaps the authorities need to appoint a gallery inspector or two – and a few long hoses! — VNS

Send Us Your Comments:

See also: