Is Woods’ possible return really news?

May 01, 2016 - 09:00

TEED OFF with Robert Bicknell

 
Viet Nam News

 

By Robert Bicknell

Since it’s the Labour Day long weekend (Reunification Day / May Day), I was thinking of making a very bad pun about Tiger’s possible return with a “he may or may not”, but decided to forgo it for the sake of my own sanity. So instead…

Will he or won’t he…?

If you read one certain magazine, Tiger Woods is almost guaranteed to make his comeback very very soon because “it would be crazy not to.” However, Tiger’s pal Michael Jordan says, “Tiger wants to retire, but doesn’t know how to do it.”

Tiger’s agent, on the other hand, says, “Although he’s improving day by day, no timetable for his return has been set.” (READ: He’s Tiger Woods and he’ll do whatever the hell he wants, whenever the hell he wants to and we’ll let you know just when he may or may not decide to do it.”

In the period of a few months, the world has lost David Bowie and Prince. Even worse, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian and Justin Bieber are still with us, so is Tiger’s “maybe could be I don’t know return” actually front page news?

Be thankful, because if it was Bubba Watson it might have been phrased as “coulda could return, but ain’t sure. “ Perfect Americanese (No, we don’t actually speak “English”)in action. Thankfully, Tiger went to Stanford and simply dithers, but with good grammar.

Yet, if you’re  golf writer you could conceivably write a story about Tiger Woods shopping at Walmart and turn it into a cover story with a four page spread. Yes, many publications do just that and the public eats it up. Unbelievable. And for every legitimate media outlet carrying a Tiger Woods story, there are also a gazillion Twitterers, Facebookers and Instagrammers posting (I refuse to call what they do “publishing” any more than implying “crowd sourcing” or “citizen journalists” are legitimate reporters).

Yes, I am grumpy again and need a holiday. And NO, Cobra Man, I am not “Teed Off” (but I am getting there). Which reminds me, my Valium supply is getting low.

From my side, yes, I was happy to see him playing a few holes at his new design, Bluejack National, but mostly because I will be putting that same grass on my new 18 hole Precision course at Trang An Golf & CC. For the record, it’s a strain of Zoysia. It looked fantastic and I cannot wait to get it here.

Speaking of great looking golf courses, I saw a “Legends of Golf” PGA tournament at a place called “Top Of The Rock” in Missouri where they played on both a Par 3 course and a full size one. I gotta tell ya the Par 3 course was simply magnificent! Excellent design, spectacular landscaping. It goes onto my bucket list of places to play before I die (which could be any day now as I take great delight in playing chicken with buffaloes at 140 kmph). Note to self…valium. More valium.

The first time I ever played a Par 3 course was in South Florida and I had a great time. The only other time was back in 1999 (RIP Prince) when the defunct “Omega Tour” couldn’t find a place to hold the event and went to Saigon South. It was actually in relatively good shape back then and we had a great time. It was a nice change of pace.

The Bluffs should build a Par 3 course on the beach for the fun of it. Another note to self – need more sunscreen. I’m still peeling from a weekend in the ocean there with my daughter last trip. No regrets – It’s the Bluffs.

Hey, that would be a good place to go this weekend! Golf, beach, casino…cannot lose even if you lose. Nah, I gotta work. Hmph!

OK, back to Tiger Woods, my guess is that he will most likely come back eventually, but for how long is anybody’s uncertain. A surgically repaired back is never a sure thing and can go out without warning. He might be coming back to play a few events and then bow out gracefully – especially if he wins one more major.

I’d say he earned the right to retire anytime he wants.

Have a great holiday!

 

teed off

E-paper